Some people might think we’re a bit funny about food. But let me start by saying that I come from a family where everyone loves good food. We think it’s just about the most important thing in life.

 

Yes, I know that not every negative reaction to a food is an allergy, but allergies are only the start of our challenges. Someone in my family is allergic to peanuts, another is hyper-sensitive to shellfish and yet another has had an anaphylactic reaction when they came into contact with egg white (albumin). They’re not unique because millions of people have food allergies, intolerances or sensitivities and the numbers are rising.

 

So what of the rest of the family? A bunch of them are lactose intolerant. Unlike the vast majority of people with northern European, Masai or northwestern Indian ancestry, our “lactose crew” have a clinical syndrome which means that somewhere between their weaning and teenage years, they lost the ability make lactase – a gastro-intestinal (gut) enzyme that digests the milk sugar called lactose. Things like cheese and ice-cream are off the menu for them.

 

Hippocrates (460-370 BC) and Galen (129-200 AD) noticed that some people had unpleasant gastro-intestinal symptoms after drinking milk. Shakespeare wrote about Sir Toby Belch, a jolly, fat, earthy yet crude comedic character in Twelfth Night, while Jonathan Swift wrote about the benefits of farting^[1]but we learned the hard way lactose intolerance isn’t a very pleasant disorder to live with; certainly not very ladylike and a bit smelly. If our “lactose crew” don’t avoid eating or drinking milk products or using what I call “white gunk” in their food – yogurt, cream, crème fraiche, and so forth – then they can be guaranteed to spend the next couple of days doubled up in pain, burping and belching – a pastime otherwise known as eructation. It’s because their gut bacteria (the good guys and critters of the intestinal microbiome) are having a field day fermenting the lactose and making short-chain fatty acids and lots – LOTS! – of gas.  And so…… abdomens swell up and distend (bloating), their guts rumble (posh name is borborygmi), they fart (experience flatulence) and have loose stools (diarrhoea). One of the “lactose crew” starts to vomit almost as soon as she eats mozzarella – so pizza’s off the menu for her, too. But then, two people among the family have coeliac disease; an autoimmune disorder that means they can’t have bread or oats because their damaged gut thinks cereals are “dangerous” and reacts accordingly. Another has Crohn’s disease. More wind, gas, pain and sometimes even blood.

 

Two others follow completely plant-based diets because they decided as children that they wouldn’t eat anything that had a face. Eating outdoors is a problem for another family member – year-round hay fever – although luckily the prescribed medicines really do work wonders. Last but not least, we count a type 1 diabetic amongst our happy band, so timing meals around insulin jabs is important; medications make them terribly constipated no matter how much fruit and veg they eat. Let’s not forget the one who had bowel cancer and had most of her colon removed; meals must be finished early, or she can’t digest a thing! As I said, some people think that we are a difficult, awkward bunch.

 

What’s my problem?

Shall we agree that everyone has the right to eat delicious, tasty food without guilt, anxiety or denial?

 

The food and hospitality industries tend to put all of the onus for food safety on each individual. Shopping becomes a chore because 21st century shops and supermarkets are stuffed to the rafters with ultra-processed foods (UPFs).  Allergic and intolerant people need to allow lots of extra time because it takes time to read each and every product label (carefully!) before they can choose foodstuffs that are free-from whatever the single problematic ingredient is.  The industries really don’t cater for multiple allergies and intolerances very well… that’s frustrating.  It becomes a nightmare if you are simply searching for a treat! 

 

Menus

People with food issues are expected to tell a restaurant in advance that they have an allergy or an intolerance, so that the staff can point out what the person can actually eat on the menu. Or they can alert the chef who has to provide an alternative. Often, the reality is that there will be just one dish that the allergic/intolerant person can choose. Food nirvana if they can have frites followed by a special potato -based dish? Misery, if that single dish is something they don’t like…. often chefs suggest something with cheese instead of meat as the protein source, so we’re back to square one with the lactose intolerance. 

 

Restaurant staff don’t hesitate to let my family know how weird they think we are if we’re trying to plan a family celebration. They look at us with horror and demand “What on earth CAN you eat?” Soya-based like tofu, Quorn or something with beans or lentils often don’t immediately come to mind for many classically trained chefs.

 

Cookbooks

Since there’s always a constant background worry of cross-contamination, it’s often easier just to start from scratch and cook everything at home. But when it comes to “health” cookbooks, many have “diet” versions of recipes or restrictive options that have taken out all the flavour. Boring! Tasteless! We tried loads of them for ourselves. I find myself screwing up my nose at the thought as I write because I like grub that’s packed full of flavour and tastes absolutely delicious.

 

The solution?

Despite all of the challenges, we have learned how to lay on big family spreads – we love a party! – where everyone could eat everything. True, it takes a bit of time, forethought and preparation but it’s easy to prepare a completely balanced meal when you know how. Most of the family can walk into any of our homes and eat almost anything and everything that’s on the table.  Yummy, healthful food from scratch. 

 

Start with a basket of fresh fruit and vegetables.  Think outside the box. Search the world for delicious food (you can Google it). Bingo! Food magic.    

[1] Jonathan Swift (1722) in The benefits of farting explain’d. he writes that a belch is but a fart half digested.